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Tip of the Week
- Library - Archives - Monday to
Sunday - 2008 |
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| May 12 - 17 |
Verbal/Emotional
Bullying
part 4 of 4
Verbal and emotional bullying can be seen on any playground in Canada or
the United States. Most of the time, this is the type of bullying we see
coming from females/girls. While the boys usually resort to Physical
torment, girls resort to gossip, rumors and innuendo.
Usually , physical torment will be over quickly. Verbal and
emotional torment last much longer. There are literally thousands of
documented cases of young girls developing eating disorders, depression
and suicidal thoughts, because of these attacks.
Parents need to be on watch for the signs that indicate your child is
being tormented. The most common signs are withdrawal from family and
friends, an increase in sleeping, stomach ache's, an increase in
sick day's from school, lack of appetite or an emotional out burst with
out reason.
Has your daughter radically changed her appearance, or doesn't care
about it anymore? Did you know, 81% of all young girls who start
cutting/mutilating themselves, did so because of being bullied at
school and then feeling isolated?
If you recognize any of these signs with your daughter, immediately
set up a appointment with your daughters school guidance counselor.
They will be able to put you in touch with professionals who can
help. DON'T under estimate what this torment is doing to your daughter,
and DON'T under estimate how serious the ramifications can be.
There are many young girls not here today, and many destroyed parents
who are, because someone didn't see the signs.
Steven
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| May 4 - 11 |
Physical Bullying
part#3 of 4
We have all seen, or been a part of Physical Bullying, because it's the
most easily recognized and most common form of bullying, whether it's at
school, work or the neighborhood.
Physical bullying includes kicking, hair pulling, punching, tripping
and damaging or theft of property. Many times, Physical bullying goes
farther than the bully intended, and the victim is seriously hurt, and
in Canada and the United States there are many documented cases of the
victim being killed / murdered. This usually happens as the aggressor
gets older, more powerful and needs a bigger "high" or " feeling of
control" from their actions. A recent study showed 50 to 75% of
students have been bullied in some form, during the last 3 years.
Action must be taken against this terrorizing abuse, so we can stop
losing kids. If you see it happening, call a teacher, parent or adult
immediately, and from a safe distance, yell for help until the bully
stops or a adult arrives. Tell your parents and ask them to call your
school.
Politely insist they get involved. Does your school have a
bullying policy? Is it being enforced? Does it need to be updated? Do
you feel it's effective? If you have answered no to any of the above
questions, ask your parents to have a meeting with the Principal
immediately. If your parents are busy, get a bunch of students
together, and politely ask your Principal for a meeting to discuss this
very dangerous issue.
Remember, if you are ever bullied off school property, tell your
parents immediately, and seriously consider getting the RCMP involved.
Steven |
| Apr 28 - May 4 |
Cyberbullying/Stalking
Part #2 of 4
Cyberbullying is the fastest growing form of harassment in todays
world. It's almost anonymous and it's the hardest to defend against. The
best way to combat these attacks, is by documentation and patience, and
try to remember ( although it will be very hard) they are only words.
If you and your parents follow these simple rules, you
will eventually catch your cyberbully/stalker, and then the courts will
deal with the problem.
Do the following:
1) save every email, text message, cell phone call/message and home
answering machine message you receive - the RCMP have amazing tracing
capabilities,
2) *69 every abusive call you receive and record the number for the
RCMP
3) document the date and time every abusive act is done to you, so the
RCMP can look for patterns
4) contact your internet provider, tell them your problem, ask for
their help and they will start you on your journey to get justice
5) if they post anonymous garbage about you on a web site, or chat
room, document it, then contact that site, and ask what their
cyberbullying/
stalking policy is, and let them know politely, you will be turning over
your documentation to the RCMP
6) when you have all your documentation together, contact the
RCMP immediately
For really outstanding information about this plague, or more tips
on how to deal with it, check out
www.cyberbullying.ca , or
www.bullying.co.uk ! These are
outstanding sites, I highly recommend
them and you can always find them in our Resources section here at
Street Smart Kidz.
Steven |
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| Apr 21 - 27 |
Bullying has become a huge part of our life during
the last 20 years. Bullying itself has been around forever, we all have
memories and/or scars from our school days, but from the start of
the "electronic age" , it has become the #1 topic with many parents,
and almost all school administrations. In my day, we dealt with
older, bigger kids pushing around younger, smaller kids. Lunch money or
bicycle's were taken, until a larger brother or the smaller child stood
up for themselves, settled the problem on the playground, and it was
over because the bully never wanted to be held accountable. As for the
girls, usually, they were ostracized from one group of girls or
another, until they found their comfortable/proper social peer groups.
Of course these are very wide generalizations, of a long ago time
period.
Today, our kids, of every age are dealing with much more horrific and
vicious bullying attacks. The popular forms of attack are physical,
verbal, emotional, sexual and electronic. The newspapers are full of
stories about the effects of these attacks, which include insomnia,
anxiety, depression and eating disorders for the boys and girls. Many
kids and teachers have been stalked and ridiculed on-line, had their
credit destroyed and had their pictures and personal information posted
in pornographic websites. And now the kids being bullied are doing the
same things electronically to their attackers, to get even. Sometimes,
after they have been isolated long enough they are getting their
revenge with guns, knives and explosives. Although we will never stop
all the bullying, or all the retaliation, there are a number of things ,
we as parents can do to stop the cycle. We are going to spend the next
4 weeks discussing these things so you, as a parent, can develop a
strategy on how to deal with this very serious problem, and also keep
your kids safe.
Steven Baird |
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Apr 14 - 20 |
This week my
daughter went on a school trip, which was perfectly supervised, correct
ratio of adults to children, and the main Teacher is a local legend
when it comes to handling kids and keeping them safe. Once in a while,
my daughter suffers from motion sickness. As the bus rolled on, she
started to feel ill. The school mate beside her, who has the same
problem, gave her a "gravol" , and she felt much better. When I picked
her up, and she told me this story, like it was a normal occurrence, I
realized I had never addressed this situation with her, and I had not
included it in our Safety Booklet. We MUST tell our children, to NEVER
accept a drug, prescription or otherwise, from anyone, unless it's from
their parents, Doctor or anyone else "YOU" decide is acceptable! I have
learned. My daughter has learned. Street Smart Kidz will now include
this in our Safety Booklet. Share this with "your" child! Next week,
we start our 5 part series on "bulling" , and how to deal with it! |
|
Apr 7 - 13 |
During this last week, the most beautiful
world wide Monument created to celebrate Peace and the Peacekeepers who
make it possible, was desecrated in Ottawa with graffiti, protesting
Canada's role in Afghanistan. Although Street Smart Kidz does not want,
or have a political agenda, we do want to tell kids that graffiti is
also vandalism, which is against the law.
We would like parents to inform their kids that they will have a
criminal record if they are convicted of vandalism. Vandalism may seem
like a victim-less crime, but our Police and Courts disagree, as do the
property owners, Towns and Cities, businesses and Peacekeepers who pay
to have graffiti cleaned up. Does your child realize, a criminal
record WILL affect their school and job prospects? They could be denied
a passport or ability to travel on the next family vacation?
This week, there were stories in newspapers from Victoria to
Halifax about businesses and property being destroyed by this senseless
act of trying to be cool.
We can stop this! Let's talk to our kid's about graffiti! |
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Mar 31 - Apr 6 |
Something for all parents to think about.
I'm as guilty, as most other parents are of this, the key is to try and
make a life style change: a commitment to our responsibilities as
parents, and to our children.
How many times this week has Coyote Ugly, Survivor, Dancing with the
Stars or American Idol been more important than our kids? We could have
talked with them, played a game with them, taught them to cook a meal
or helped with their spelling. We could have asked about their friends,
what's happening in their school or what they were doing on the web.
Instead, we parked our butts in front of the T.V. , and lost a chance
to be closer to our kids, know them better, and maybe shaped a future
thought or decision. As for myself, this week I'll do better! |
|
Mar 24 - 30 |
Every parent should have a I.D. kit
completed on every one of their children, from the ages of 3 to 15.
This kit should include fingerprints, latest dental and medical
records, a recent photograph
which you should update every 6 months and a hair sample of 5 to 10
strands with the follicle attached. Put the hair strands in a zip-lock
bag. Keep all of this information in a envelope, in your closet. If
your child asks why you are doing this, simply say " it's a record of
you in case you get lost, and it will help the Police find you right
away". By keeping this record, you have saved the Police countless
hours, if your child ever goes missing. The Police will appreciate it,
you will have helped your child get home quicker, and it's the right
thing to do.
You can
order a FREE I.D Kit from Street Smart Kidz anytime, and we will
mail it out right away. |
|
Mar 17 - 23 |
Any parent with a child 16 or under ,
should ask their child the following.
Question: Your soccer, hockey, football, baseball,
swimming, karate or any other coach offers to drive you home after a
game or practice. What do you do ?
Answer: You politely say NO ! Do Not Accept ! The
reason is , your parents will not know where you are. Your parents MUST
know where you are at all times. Do not accept a ride from anyone,
ANYONE, unless you tell your parents first, or they have your secret
code word. |
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Mar 10 - 16 |
One of the growing problems , the RCMP see
with our kids aged 10 to 16, is the usage of prescription drugs. Some of
our kids are stealing our (their parents') prescriptions out of the
medicine cabinet, and either using them, or selling them. Ask yourself
or partner if it seems like you are going for refills more often lately.
A wise RCMP Officer told me recently, "parents with teenagers, should
treat their prescriptions the same way they treat their alcohol in the
house. Lock it up, measure it or hide it."
It's just common sense. |
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Mar 3 - 9 |
This one goes out to the parents, with kids between 8 and 16 years
of age. Question to ask your child: your best friend asks you if
you would go with them, as they have met a really cool friend
on-line, and are going to get together. What
would you do?
The correct answer is: I wouldn't go with them, I would try to talk
them out of this really stupid situation, if they went to the
meeting I would call 911, then I would call my parents to tell them
of the danger, and I would ask my parents to talk to my friends
parents about the dangers.
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Feb 25 - Mar 2 |
Did You Know: as a single
female parent, 68.2% of 14 years of age or younger females will be
sexually, mentally or physically abused by the man you bring into
the house, as your new "partner". Don't let the wolf in the hen
house. If you haven't spent Two years with this man, he doesn't get
house keys. I have conducted hundreds of interviews with woman, ages
25 to 45, and they all said the same thing. 1. don't believe it
happened 2.my daughter must be making it up 3. the Police are
exaggerating because they couldn't make the last charge stick, and
4. (my personal favourite) "you can plainly see its a lie, I'm much
more attractive than my daughter". Keeping your bed warm, because
your afraid to be alone, is a devastating price for your child to
pay! Think about it!
If you are a child in this
situation, contact us.Reverse the charges, tell us where you are,
and we can get someone to pick you up. We will pay the ticket, feed
you, direct you to the appropriate authorities, and hold your hand
every step of the way. Your Mom made a bad decision. You didn't. Be
Safe!
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Feb 18 - 24 |
Make sure your children realize, that nothing is
as important, or
worth as much as their life. If anyone ever
confronts them , and wants their ipod, DS, shoe's, bicycle, money,
jewelry or anything else, make them understand they should just give
it to the person or people
demanding it. Make sure they know material
objects can always be
replaced, but they can never be replaced.
|
| Feb
11 - 17 |
Please download or print our blank Emergency Phone Numbers List. It
will always be available to you here at Street Smart Kidz, for free.
Post it beside your kitchen phone, and show every member of your
family where it is. Show every babysitter before you leave the
house. Update it whenever needed. Some parents have laminated this
form, so it's always clean, tidy and up to date.
For the
blank Emergency Phone Numbers List
click here |
| Feb
4 - 10 |
Make sure your
child/children know they can depend on you to pick them up, anytime,
anywhere 24 hours a day. Praise them when they do it , and depending on
the circumstances, reward them. Discuss why you are a better alternative
than hitch-hiking, what can happen if they get into a strange car, or
what can happen if they try to get home with a friend that has been
drinking alcohol. Point out news articles about kids that make the wrong
decision. This may seem harsh, in your face reality, but it's better
than the alternative. Who wants a Cop banging on your door at 1am?
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| Jan
30 - Feb 3 |
Do NOT put your child's
name on their clothing or toys. A child is less likely to fear
someone that knows his or her name. If your child is in a
situation where they must have their name on their clothing,
such as sporting events or teams, put their name on tape, and
attach to the inside of their clothing.
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| Jan
21 - 28
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Have a secret code word, that only you
and your child know. When having someone else pick up your child,
they must say the code word to the child or the child should refuse
to go with them. Even if its a Aunt or Uncle, if they don't know the
code word, the child should refuse to go with them. Remember to
change the word after each usage, and remind your child what the
word is once a week, until it's memorized.
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| Jan
14 - 20 |
Never allow your child to have a
computer in their bedroom, or any other room where there will be
minimal parental traffic or walk bys. This will discourage your kids
from going to inappropriate sites, and you will always be able to
stop and see how your kids are using the computer. There is NOT one
legitimate reason for the computer to be anywhere, other than a
family room. Please remember this very important rule.
Steven
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